The Process of Finding Yourself: A Simple Guide

The Process of Finding Yourself: A Simple Guide


The Process of Finding Yourself: A Simple Guide

The Process of Finding Yourself: A Simple Guide. I heard that great writers are great because they have found themselves. They have found their own voice. I am completely jealous because I am not quite there yet. That was one of the main reasons for starting this blog. I wanted to “find” myself. What does that even mean to find yourself? There are so many life experiences that take you on an incredible journey. Whether it’s good or bad, we live and we learn. Yes keeping positive does help you appreciate what you have but what about those not so positive challenges that face us? That is what takes us closer into finding ourselves.

Oh love that makes the world go around….love is something we wait and search for. Dreaming of that perfect moment to discover our passion or even finding that special someone. We never imagine the heartbreak and disappointment because that is terrifying. It is the pain of love that truly changes us. The losing of love that makes us who we are.

Life is complicated sometimes. There is promise though to opening up to new beginnings. Everything happens for a reason and you just have to take those unique chances in life.

It seems that when you step up in life to invite change, life has a way of guiding you to exactly where you need to be, with whom you need to be with, and hearing what you need to hear.- Tiny Buddha Blog

I don’t know where you are in your life but sometimes reevaluating your happiness in life and acting on it can shake things up for the better. Here is some guidance if you feel stuck or just want to discover more passion for yourself. I know I am working on these currently.

1. Stop Thinking and Just Do It

Take a risk. Do something impulsive. I know I tend to over analyze my situations and I am working on just doing as I feel. Take that trip to that country you have always wanted to visit. I remember doing that in college. I was in Costa Rica for four months and I remember sitting on the beach telling myself that I needed to do another semester of this traveling fun. So I decided to apply for some study abroad scholarships and work more hours at the bar to make this happen. That next semester I was in France and I ended up exploring Europe those four months visiting Italy, Spain, and Switzerland.

While people were encouraging me to go take that semester to complete classes for my Masters in Accounting, that definitely wasn’t my passion to continue the studying. Something in my gut told me to take that trip to Europe instead of following my colleagues down that path. At that time I was stressed and scared about my future. I was scared that I was doing something completely crazy and would be way behind others in my academic path. I felt I might waste that year of traveling for building my knowledge to get into a top notch firm but once I landed in Paris, those worries went away and everything felt just right.

When I look back, I was so glad I went with my gut and enjoyed my last year in college traveling the world. Those were the best times of my life. So while this example applied to taking that impulse trip, anything could be applied such as taking that dream job offer, marking off bucket list desires, or even simply going to that one unique event others never thought you would go to.

Just live damn it. You have to make mistakes to discover what you like and dislike. Doing the same things won’t help you explore your boundaries.

2. Let Go of the Unnecessary

Let go of unnecessary things or people in your life. It can also mean to simply quit something in your life. Winners never quit right? Well only when it pertains to you owning that passion and pressing forth with it. Not if you realize that you absolutely dread doing something and keep going. What’s the point of doing that?

Make a list of the things you commit to at work, family, and social life. Notice what things you can let go to make life a little less stressful and more enjoyable.

The things that bring you happiness, that wake you up in the morning, that you lay awake thinking about at night—do those things.

The things that weigh you down, that seem like a drag, that steal life from you and make you angry—quit those.

As a dear friend would always jokingly say: KISS! Keep It Simple Stupid 🙂 It really isn’t hard. May be easier said than done but you can do it. Again, don’t let the peer pressure of what others say steer you in the wrong direction.

3.Socialize with Strangers

Everyone has a story, an opinion, and an insight into opportunities. It is about the connections you make in life. When I moved to Kansas City, I was terrified of not knowing anybody. Quickly that wasn’t the case as I met people at work, joined meet ups and intramural sports leagues, and found networking events to be brave and attend. There is this really neat site I discovered when I moved called Meet Up:Find Your People. I was thrilled to find groups of similar interests. People are out there that want to talk about the things you like to talk about and I was excited to find this avenue to meet others.

A couple of weeks ago I even Googled art events in my city. Found a free tour that would take me on a walk around the city that explored artist galleries and studios. I met a fantastic vision artist and it wasn’t long and we hit off the conversation into similar things we enjoyed. A fashion art show and dinner later, it wasn’t long and I was already finding others that talked about things I enjoyed which was art. I got the chance to go to a poetry slam event that I have always wanted to attend to support a stranger (now I call friend) who shared his absolutely creative writing.

Something interesting to do which I learned how to do eventually is to go to events alone. Although it is always fun to have a friend tag along, it is a even more rewarding sometimes to try something alone. It forces you to meet someone and talk about the things you are interested in. Try it, I dare you.

4. Don’t Put Your Dreams on Hold

Well if we are trying to find ourselves and discover who we are, we might not exactly know what our dreams are but for some you might already know. At least evaluating the things you enjoy in your life will help you down a path to finding it. For me it is starting my own business. I want to own something and have it revolve around the things I enjoy in life. I have started in that process of starting my business but for others you might be putting on the excuses of time and money. That is why you let go of the things that might be taking away that time for you to achieve those dreams. Money comes and goes. There is always a way to find it though. A good friend of mine was so persistent in finding funds to start her business. She didn’t let anyone distract her from her passion. A couple years later and she managed to present to investors to get $80,000 for her idea. A dream come true for her and I am excited to see her take on that journey. I first hand witnessed the tough work she did to achieve those funds. It didn’t come easy because she came from money or anything. She had to put in major effort to meet those key people to get her to even pitch the idea.

If you enjoy doing it, then it shouldn’t be hard to achieve those dreams. Just keeping on keeping on. The good that will come of it is you enjoying life doing it. That is the most important.

 5. Do Something Different

Try something that you wouldn’t typically do. You can’t know you don’t like something if you don’t try it. We are constantly changing to explore who we are so just keep taking on these tiny adventures. Try that new cultural restaurant, go dancing, or visit that local store. Go on Groupon or LivingSocial and explore what different things you can do. Broaden your horizons 🙂

I noticed in my life that the most random things I do differently are the fun stories I definitely remember and share with people.


Finding myself isn’t easy but it definitely is a fun process as I explore new opportunities and meet new people. Something wise I heard was that if you don’t define the things that make you who you are, someone will find their way to define who you are. Don’t let that happen. It’s easy for that to happen if you care about what others think, but be bold enough to say what you feel. Be unique and that simply means to stand up for what you believe in. Makes life a little easier when you are proud to say it out loud. There is always something to learn so like that old adage, life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you react to it!


Blog Signature4afb06303f0d1b81c7ef33525e655d3bb50155dd64b58648cf


Leave a Reply